I'm learning very quickly that cancer trials are unpredictable. I was not prepared for that. Plain and simple. I am coming off of consistent chemotherapy for a year and 3 months....when I went to MD Anderson to see if I was eligible for this trial-I thought I'd be rolling on into the the next phase of trying to beat this thing. I haven't had chemo in 4 months and I'm a little scared. Just what are those tumors doing in there? I can feel the effects on most days as I've shared before...but I don't want to fade away while waiting for this trial to begin. I guess I am a little frustrated that the trip that I was to go on this week didn't work out.
There was an oral chemo drug that I took daily (11 pills!) that has to be completely out of my system before the trial can begin and long story short...it isn't. So there has been hang ups on their end and I guess on my end too.
Justin and I were to leave on Tuesday and I was completely miserable at the thought of missing the kids first day of school. I'll just say it: stage 4 cancer makes you not.want.to.miss.a.thing....
So on Monday, I took the boys out to lunch to get some time in together before I was suppose to leave-thank you guys for suggesting that! Via Instagram, here we are, bellies full:
(Can you tell Keegan is just tolerating me? Ha) sweetsomethingdesign if you'd like to join me over on the gram.
The week before school, we ran up to Carthage to Precious Moments Chapel. I took some pictures of the boys and meandered through the chapel and grounds. It really is peaceful out there.
But guys. I didn't miss the first day of school. That is what good came out of the appointment falling through. I might of cried a little. My boys are growing so fast! I had the Houston trip on my mind so much that I've been a picture taking fool (not that I'm not anyway). I figured, why stress myself out just getting pictures on "the first day of school"....I'm dedicating the whole week to getting pictures. I'm just glad I'm here.
I want to get some good photos of Keegan, probably this weekend. Right after school is football practice so I haven't been able to get him where he's not too exhausted for pictures.
Also, my sweet potato vine is massive! It has completely taken over the walk way and swallowed up even the birdbath. I love it though and we've just been walking around it on a small little strip of walkway. The green is SO bright and fresh.
I want to say a few things too, since this post is completely wishy-washy and sporadic anyway. I get emails often asking questions about projects here and there, how I did this or that and I answer....but then I get another email apologizing that they read further about the cancer and all....don't be sorry! I can still answer questions and help as much as I can. Now when I was going through chemo and in bed for days at a time, that was different-but I'm not bed ridden or anything I still do laundry and dishes (ugh), I can answer your questions. I just wanted to say that. If I feel like I can't blog/answer emails at all, I'll just say so. Having said that, I know I don't post very often any more and when I do it's usually updates on my health...so thank you all for sticking around. Do I miss decorating, tablescapes and projects-YES! But this is what it is right now so I'm dealing. I appreciate the prayers and encouragement, you all help me so, so much. Know that.